frustration

Recently one of our clients was contacted by an out of state organization guaranteeing amazing results through SEO.  So amazing were their claims that my client asked me to evaluate their promises.  

SEO is a valuable service and one that we provide for many of our clients.  It is not magic. It is a whole lot of hard work.  Results take a long time but they pay off in the end.  The first red flag was that the other company pitching my client promised first page results within 90 days.    SEO is a marathon, and not a sprint.  It may take 6 months or more before you start seeing results.  

They also claimed to have an “IN” with Google – Red Flag #2.   All I had to do was a Google Search under their company name and the complaints were all over the web.

It was true 100 years ago, and it is true today.  If it sounds too good to be true…it probably is.  

For your viewing pleasure I have posted their “privacy policy” below.  Many of the online complaints made fun of even calling it a privacy policy.  They basically have all the rights to all your data for perpetuity, and they can sell it at any time.  To avoid a nasty lawsuit I have changed the name of the company to the word “Satan” and their personal info to XXXX.  

Privacy Policy

Satan Inc (“Satan”) has created this Privacy Policy in order to disclose its use of consumer data collected about you. This Privacy Policy is effective as of xxxxx. You may contact Satan at XXXXXXXXX or via our contact form. The following discloses Satan’s information gathering and dissemination practices for its website.

Information Collected and Received Satan may collect or receive information about you when you register with the Satan website or submit information , including, but not limited to, user name, password, first and last name, email address, street address, gender, occupation, interests, messages sent to other users, and any other data included in a submitted profile or resume. Satan may collect information on the pages you access and other information you may volunteer, such as survey information, ratings, reviews, questions, and answers. Satan may also record actions taken on its websites including, but not limited to, clicks, page views, IP address, and search queries. Satan may store this information on its equipment or the equipment of third parties that it has a relationship with. Please note that emails, messages sent via your web browser, and other similar means of communication with other users are not encrypted. We strongly advise you not to communicate any confidential information through these means.

Uses of Information Satan may use the information we collect to try to provide a safe, efficient, and customized experience. Satan uses this information, including but not limited to your company or personal information, social networks, website metrics, to provide our services and features to you, to measure and improve those services and features, and to provide you with customer support. We may use the information to prevent potentially illegal activities and activities that are detrimental to other users. We may use a variety of methods to detect and address anomalous activity and screen content to prevent abuse such as spam. These efforts may on occasion result in a temporary or permanent suspension or termination of some functions for some users. From time to time, we may, or companies we partner with may, contact you. Satan’s site may require you to give Satan contact information (such as your name, company name and email address) and demographic information. Satan may use your contact information to (i) send you brand alerts; (ii) create an account; and (iii) send you information about Satan and promotional material from some of Satan’s partners. Your contact information is also used to contact you when necessary. Satan may use demographic and/or profile data to tailor your experience on Satan’s site, show you content that Satan thinks you may be interested in, and display content according to your preferences. To the extent you upload a resume, Satan may make the resume and other personal information contained therein available to third parties or search engines. Satan reserves the right to charge third parties a fee for accessing your information. This means that the personal information contained in your resume can be viewed by third parties and you may receive unsolicited contact from parties unaffiliated with Satan. Satan reserves the right to disclose any information when required by law. We may use other companies to perform services necessary to our operations. In the course of providing these services, those companies may have access to your personal information. By contractual agreement, those companies must treat your information in accordance with this Privacy Policy. However, we will not be liable for any damages that may result from the misuse of your personal information by these companies. Satan may use your IP address to help diagnose problems with Satan’s service and to administer Satan’s site. Your IP address may also be used to help identify you, your location, and your online profile and to gather broad demographic information. Nothing shall restrict Satan from maintaining your data following your termination of your relationship with Satan. Satan may delete your user data at Satan’s sole discretion.

Security Satan uses industry-standard technologies when transferring and receiving consumer data exchanged between Satan and other companies to help ensure its security. This site has security measures in place to protect the loss, misuse and alteration of the information under Satan’s control.

Cookies “Cookies” are small pieces of information that are stored by your browser on your computer’s hard drive. Satan’s site uses cookies to keep track of your session and advertising delivery. Satan may also use cookies to deliver content specific to your interests and to save your password. We use third-party advertising companies to serve ads when you visit our website. These companies may use third-party cookies to record information (not including your name, address, email address, or telephone number) about your visits to this and other websites in order to provide advertisements about goods and services of interest to you. You can learn more here.

Links Satan may create links to other web sites. When you click on links on Satan you may leave our site. We are not responsible for the privacy practices of other sites, and we encourage you to read their privacy statements.

Amendments Satan may amend this policy at any time. If Satan is going to use personally identifiable information collected through Satan’s site in a manner materially different from that stated at the time of collection Satan will notify users via email and/or by posting a notice on Satan’s website for 30 days prior to such use.

Assignment If there is a change of control in Satan’s business (whether by merger, sale, or otherwise) or if there is an asset sale, the user information, including personal information, could be sold as part of that transaction and your personally identifying information potentially could be used by the purchaser. However, if that business materially changes this statement or the information-handling practices as described in this Privacy Policy, you will be notified by email and/or through a notice posted on the website, and you may opt-out of the use of your existing information in a new manner. This Privacy Policy inures to the benefit of any successors or assigns of Satan or the assets of Satan.

Contacts If you have any questions about this Privacy Policy, the practices of this site, or your dealings with this web site, you can contact us.

 Sincerely, 

Satan